Monday, December 25, 2006

Wednesday, January 11th, 2006 2:27 pm



Things I like about Thailand

Driving
1. Driving the down the street onto incoming traffic
2. Parking on the sidewalk
3. Left hand turns on a red light
4. Traffic lights that count down
5. Putting a BBQ on the side of your bike and starting a business
6. Taking the front wheel off your bike and putting a trolley on the front
7. No way of enforcing speed limits
8. Getting 5 people on a 120cc motorbike
9. Roadside food stalls - stop bike, buy food
10. Police not pulling you over because they do not speak English




Food
11. Being able to get a feed for under $AU1
12. Being able to get a feed 24/7
13. Being able to buy liquor at 24/7
14. Food vendors coming to your street
15. Fruit carts
16. Shopping at the markets
17. Having someone whose sole job is to pour your drinks
18. Maitai - all you can eat buffet where you cook your food at your table
19. Floating restaurants
20. Seafood and chicken - best I have tasted, anywhere

Sunday, January 8th, 2006 1:07 pm



NYE
Ok here is the story
Four day weekend
It is a big holiday in Thailand
Firstly, there were no classes on the Friday as they were having a party
That was pretty cool. Everyone was keen to hit the road for Ko Pang Nang.
It was M&D's last days in Suratthani, so I hung around town with them until they left on the Saturday morning.
The rest of the crew headed off with all the gear - cool box, booze and essentials.
Before we could leave school though, they wanted us to play a traditional Thai game - in other words - make an arse of yourself for their amusement

This is how it went down
There are five rows of chairs
One for each of the farang teachers
The first had a water bottle and a plate of flour
You wet your face then fish the five baht coin out of the flour with your teeth
The second - a needle and thread. Thread the needle.
The third - two jelly cups and an overripe banana. Eat it.
The next - a cube of sugar khonom thing and a warm bottle of pepsi. Eat and drink.
Finally - blow up a balloon until it bursts

I dabbed the water. Used my teeth to tip over the flour. Picked up the coin.
Threaded the needle on the second try.
Opened the jelly cups by sticking my thumb in it thus loosing half of it.
Ate most of the banana.
The sugar cube thing mixed with the warm pepsi was sending things sideways though. It became this sugary goop in my mouth, could not swallow.
Waited for the judge to turn his head and stuck most of it down my shirt - to the delight of the crowd. Sculled the warm, rancid pepsi.
Blow up the balloon and step on it as it was half full of sugary goop.
I was declared the winner by cheating and everyone was relieved that the whole thing was over and the four day weekend could get under way.


We were going to hire a car for the day so that I could show Mum and Dad round some choice places near town. Unfortunately, it was packed out. So I had a word with a tuk tuk driver who agreed to drive us around for 24 hours for about A$15 plus gas.
Got Mum to the dentist to fix her chipped tooth, went up Khao Tepet and looked out over the city and he even drove us out to this choice little restaurant down back alley half way to Phun Phin. And back again.

The next day we had a hearty breakfast at the Wang Tai and then it was teary farewells on train platforms.
I went back to my life in Suratthani.
Which meant getting on the motorbike and making the two o'clock ferry. It is the fastest that I have made the trip to Don Sak where the boats leave from.


Three hours on the boat.
Up to Haad Salad... ahh Haad Salad - they have good salad. The place is in a bubble. I feel safe in that bubble.

The were already there and they greeted me
with a large G&T.
We tuk tuked to Haad Rin
The road is too crazy man,
especially on a night like this.

We brought the esky and had cocktails on the way
we also found goodies that we enjoyed just before midnight and kept us going till dawn.
Along with all the gin and vodka in the cool box

We ate a hearty cheese burger each and set up base camp at the base of a Shark Sign.


From here on in it gets a little blurry.
Good times were had by all however
Kelsie and the Big Black dude
Kerry got the cute Israeli
Willy sat and watched and a prostitute brought her luggage and sat between his legs for hours
She was looking for a place to stay and under Willy is as good a place as any certainly safe under the big American dude

It did not stop this random coming and trying to chat her up. That was weird.

There was allot of bad dancing to bad music

For the number of clubs on that beach, you would have thought there would be some better music
Not to be

After the trip to mellow mountain
2006 was creeping over the horizon
and the ugliness was rapidly slipping out of the shadows and into your face

We gotta get outta here man
lets do it you got the cool box
on the road

We were half way back
Where's Willy man
we kept the cool box but lost willy

I thought he had headed back already
Apparently not

The next day was shaky
I did not have a room
Went for an early morning swim instead
Ended sleeping on the floor of Sean's place

About fours hours and I was up again
We were all riding the storm
Had hoped to go to bottle beach
It was not to be
I gotta room for the night though
luxury

Next morning
Breakfast on the beach
Bike to Chokalom and long boat to Bottle

Bottle Beach is divine
surrounded by jungle
a quiet bay
only accessible by long boat
a couple of guest houses that only open for a few months of the year
ssshhh... do not tell anyone
or they will wreck it.

That night however
I broke my back
or that is what it felt like
nasty
I really thought I was done for
Fortunately, it turned out to be nothing more than pulled muscles
but I am still sore

No need to ask how it happened
suffice it to say
"in order to be old and wise
you must first be young and stupid "


Let us say that I am older and wiser now.
The long boat ride
The bike to the ferry
Three hours on the ferry
all had to be done
but the 70kms from Don Sak to Surat
was unthinkable
Luckily,
Adam was on the boat and I nabbed his bus ticket
he took the bike and survived

It was agony
But it was back to work the next day

Hey kids
rewrite this and leave me alone - I am in pain
Cheers

Anyway, that is the story

At the beginning of '06
my body has made it clear
that it will not take this shit anymore
Will have to remember that for next year

Anyway

Peace out

Love y'all

Al

Monday, December 26th, 2005 4:42 pm


Have a Cool Yule

Once again, sorry folks.
After a good start in 2004, my blogging has gone seriously downhill in '05.
The only excuse that I can offer is that I have been too busy living the good life to tell you about it.

I can tell you this about living in Thailand however:

The food is good,

The weather is good,

The environment is good,

The people are good,

The ladies are good,

The guys are good,

The crew is good,

The times are good,

The islands are good, and

The lifestyle is good.

Basically everything is good, most things better than good, superlative.

Someone cleans my house, does my washing and cooks my food. All I need is someone to mix my drinks and I will be sorted - it would be a full time gig though!

Xmas in a Buddist country is a bit different to Oz. Firstly, it is not a holiday - I just got home from work and it is boxing day. The good news is that we get four days off at new years.

Missing the xmas holiday is not really a drama, when you get so many other days off during the year - King's Birthday, Buddha days, Songkhran etc. etc.

Allot of my students are interested in the holiday, but know very little about it or what it means. It all seems a bit secondary to the getting of presents.

I spent the day with my parents who have been visiting for the past few weeks. This has been an adventure in itself:

They arrived in BKK and I gave the essential highlights of town, tour. Mainly because if I stay in the capital for more than a couple of days I start getting a nervous twitch. It is a bit too crazy for my liking.

Essential highlights tour:



Tuk tuk to the river



River bus up the Chao Phra



Off to the Palace and Emerald Buddha



Tuk tuk to Khao San Road to laugh at the farang



Lunch



Tuk tuk to The Golden Mount Climb and look over the city



Canal boat to Siam Square regionMRT back to the hotel



Collapse
China town



Worlds biggest jewery store



Lunch



Chill outDinner



Patpong gogo bars for happy hour



Patpong markets



Patpong performance art show (aka pussy show)

After that we headed up to the old captial of Ayuttaya to see all the temples and take a long boat trip around the town's old mote. Once we were wat - ed out it was up to Lopburi to see the mad monkeys that have taken over the centre of town. Amazing. Check out the photos at the website below.

From there it was back down to Surat so I could start work again and Michael and Katherine were left to there own devices to wander around the town that has been my home for the better part of this year.

They seemed to like it, despite its exterior ugliness, they seemed to see why the translation of Suratthani means - place of good people. And of course the food is devine.

A few days in Surat is enough for anyone, so I sent them off to Khao Sok. This they enjoyed and stayed for longer than I have, after partaking in an elephant ride, they headed off to Krabi.

They had a few days around there and Ao Nang, before heading over to Ra Lay. This is where I met them on Friday night. I travelled across that afternoon, post - work. Three hours on a bus, half an hour on the back of a motorbike and twenty minutes on a longboat and I was walking up the beach to the cocktails.

Xmas eve we spent walking, eating, swimming and having a few Singhas. Before dinner and fireworks on the beach. I headed out to the Skunk Bar and Gekko bar where I met the local rastas as well as - you guessed it - 25 bloody English teachers. You cannot get away from the buggers.

I stumbled in at about three and passed out only to be rudely woken by the sun at 8.30. Driven more by the need of caffine than the xmas spirit, I ventured out into the light...

A swim at the beach was essential as well as a large greasy breakfast. Both were accomplished before I had to jump back on the longboat and head back to Surat for the next weeks frivolities with the kids.

On arriving on the soi however, I found myself in the middle of yet another festivity. Everyone had dragged tables and chairs into the street to have xams dinner on the soi. A finer farang feast I have yet to have in Thailand. Turkey, mashed tatties, gravy, stuffing, the works. Bloody brilliant. Full compliments to the cooks and my oven, which someone actually got to work!

Anyway, after a few scotches plus dessert we finished just in time to not get enough sleep. In short that means that I am knackered right now and am off for a kip.

Feel free to check out the latest photos, they have been regularly updated at:http://www.flickr.com/photos/64776711@N00/

Anyway, have a happy non denominational winter holiday season.




Peace be with you.




Take it easy




All the best

Al

Monday, July 25th, 2005 4:45 pm




Backdated entries:

Dearest Reader,

In light of the lack of entries over the past couple of months, I will try and make up for it by giving you some of my personal (edited) journal notes for the missing period. I hope that this does not bore you to death and makes up for my tardiness. I will be sure to make sure that it says up to date.

Enjoy...

Sunday, April 03, 2005
Well here it is, the first journal entry using the new laptop. Loaded on the photos and some music and now we are ready to rock.

Spent the extra money on getting the VIP coach from Singapore and did not regret it in the least. Walked on into the air conditioning and was loving it. Twice the room of the Greyhound buses and even cheap ripped off movies. Gotta love it.

Was getting worried that we were not going to stop at Malacca, but sure enough there was a transfer bus waiting for me and the driver got me to jump on it. Arrived in town and jumped in a cab. That cost me 10 ringgits. Three bucks is better than walking around with all this crap - computers and coffee and books. My life is too short for the want of three Aussie dollars. I had also splashed out on getting a single room booked over the internet that cost me about $7AU. I thought I might as well for that price.

My heart sank when I saw the accommodation however. It was a run down old building and they showed me up to the double room. Unimpressive. The people were fairly surly initially as well. The room has a Spanish hacienda motif mural on the walls, four walls, a door, a window to the corridor, two single beds pushed together and an electric fan. On reflection though I cannot complain. The cheapest dorm room that I got in Oz was $12. This place is nothing to look at but hey, what the fuck.

What really boosted my spirits was what followed. I went out to find a feed and some local currency. Found the bank that would accept my card (which even had an English option) then went on the food hunt.

After a couple dead ends, or at least dark alleys that did not seem all that inviting, I got a beverage from a curry house and sat down. Lit a cigarette. An old Chinese bloke asked if there was anyone sitting here, and I said to help himself. He launched into praise of Cathy Freeman as he was a runner some thirty odd years ago. I found him entertaining company, even if his English was a bit hard to follow. He gave me some interesting local knowledge as well. Half of the Malaysian population is non-Malay. Mainly Indian and Chinese who have been around for centuries, however, they are treated as second class citizens. Apparently there is allot of crime around, allot of drugs brought in from Thailand. He pointed to on bloke walking past who is the son of the police chief, a drug pusher yet never gets sent away. He said to watch my back and avoid the dark alleys. My gut instinct was right. I was wondering about the Malaysian Language as I do not speak a word of it or so I thought. It has roman characters which I thought was funny compared to the incomprehensible script of the Thai. He said it was a bastard language. Hello, yes, no, please and thank you are all the same as in English. They spell things differently.

He also recommended the restaurant a couple of doors down that I intended to visit.

I thanked him for the conversation and headed off. As I noticed before the place was packed, which is why it appealed to me. I wandered in. There was one white guy in the place with a black girl. A Chinese girl directed me to an empty table and I sat for a moment wondering what to do. I went up and spoke to the white dude. I said, "Do you speak English by any chance?" He said "Yes, Sprenken zie duetch?", to which I replied "Nine". He said that he thought I was German which I get quite often from the Dutch, as he turned out to be.

I joined them at their table on the grounds that I did not crack onto his girlfriend. They gave me a few restaurant tips - you go up, select what you want from the cold cabinet then stick the sticks of meat, fish and vegetables into the satay sauce on a burner in the middle of the table. Fucking brilliant. Ate myself silly for $14 RM. Have not have any reoccurrence of the stomach trouble either which is a good thing.

Tuesday, April 05, 2005
Finally cut the last of my dreads off, less painful than I expected but allot of work. It feels strange to have my hair back again. It took a long time to unravel the mass of knots and I am free. It is great to have a decent scratch at last.

Woke up at 9. Earlier than expected. Went to a coffee house on the river and had the Malaysian breakfast, toast beans and eggs with a black coffee.

Went and bought a new shirt off a Indian bloke who scalped me, but that is alright. His son is at Monash University in Melbourne. This turned out to be the more expensive option instead of doing washing. Tomorrow's priority.

Caught a cab to the bus station. Bought a paper and a pack of crisps and took the 12.30 up to KL. There has been two more bombings in southern Thailand. Not a good scene. Will have to by pass the area.

I am looking forward to getting straight up to Surrat and sussing out my new employers. Arrived in KL and went to china town, where Yen (my host and pool partner from Malacca) had suggested finding lodging. Walked from the station and even found a bloke who was trying to sell me the same place. A funny Malay bloke with heaps of gold face piercings. He came with me and showed me some rooms. This one is good. Double bed with a fan. It seems to be the par. The all seem to be the same price.

I went and had a nap straight away for an hour and a half. Got up hungry and went out on the prowl. Wandered aimlessly for a while and decided on a pre diner drink. While looking for the Reggae bar that was advertised in the hostel, I met our man again who told me it was directly opposite. I went back and had a beer. It was quiet. Decided not to eat there and wandered back up towards the bus station.

Here there was a bloke selling Rolex watches.

How much.?

Very good imitation. For you 250.

No thanks.


I wandered if there were some more and went in further. Not just more, hundreds more. Watches, leather goods, shoes, DVDs, CDs, fruit and veg.

To cut a long story short, I walked away with three CDs, a DVD and a Tag watch. All ten each.

Wednesday, April 06, 2005
Ok, I am pissed. Maybe. I thought I might treat myself to a decent meal and took a seat at the flash version of the food court, the one with to table cloths and service. I should have known better. For the extra money you table clothes and service. Not all that much better. At least I got some spring rolls.I was sitting there drinking by beer and an Asian bloke offered to join me after we were frequenting the same DVD hawker.
We ended up chatting until 1100. He was a Christian from the other side of Malaysia, the east side which is quite different apparently.

He was grieving for the loss of his aunty and is due to marry his Italian catholic fiance้ in June. A match made in heaven.

Anyway, we drank many a beer and compared experiences. He suggested offering the lowest price possible to the hawkers. If they do not like it you can go to the next one, and they will run after you.

After I left him, concentrating on my step, I went to the nearest DVD seller and he showed me to his store…. The back of a food stall with a couple of lockable cabinets. I went through and chose ten that I wanted to watch. I offered him 50 for the 90 worth of CDs. To cut a long story short he agreed on 65. We both walked away happy. Until I play the CDs anyway.

Earlier that day...When I was walking past a McDonald's, a man at a bus stop asked if he could speak with me. They bought me a coffee in exchange for talking to me for a little while. His daughter is going to Melbourne to work as a nurse and he wanted me to put his wife's mind at rest. I even spoke to her on the phone. I gave him all the information that I had on the subject and he wanted me to go to his home. This was a bit too close for my liking, so I agreed to take his number and give him a call when I was free. Before long I met another two women who had relations that were going to live in Australia and wanted me to come to their homes. I have some numbers now that I do not intend to call. I think that they are looking for husbands. This is going a little too far.

Later that day...

In the afternoon I was at a loss for direction, so I let my feet do the walking. I ended up seeing the Sultanate palace and the largest flag pole in the world, apparently. Went for a walk around, trying to get my bearing on this city, with little success but did see some amazing architecture. I ended up back at The Reggae Bar where I spoke to one of the staff who was from Burma and would dearly like to return home but the Junta prevents it. He says that by 2006 there might be a chance of democracy. I do not hold my breath. From there I ended up at the restaurant with the table clothes and back here. Writing this. Tomorrow: Climb that tower thing, CDs, cheap work shirts, check email, Museums and cultural stuff. We will see. The day after Surrat.

Friday, April 08, 2005
Took the tram over to KLCC and looked around for that big tower thing that appears on all the tourist crap. It was not until I wandered outside that I realized that the train had stopped under the tower. I got a ticket to go up to the sky bridge, which was free, so I thought I might splash out and have a real sit down lunch. I decided on the Cesar salad with chicken.

Adequate to say the best. It was good to have some lettuce and a break from greasy noodles.

Went up the tower and looked over the city from 170m up. It was pretty impressive, especially the pollution. Nice view.

Went to the Museum. Not the most interactive in the world, but it did have English information. One place you are guaranteed to get away from tourists is anywhere cultural.

It was interesting to learn of Malaysian history, as what I knew of Malaysia could be written on the back of a postage stamp. It breaks down like this: people have been here for 40 000 years plus, Arab traders brought Islam in 1300's then the Portuguese invaded in 1511. The Dutch kicked them out in about 1640 and were replaced by the British some two hundred years later. The Japanese kicked them out in WW2 and when they left the British were back and everyone rallied for their own country. Apart from that there were some communists who were looking to take over but got their arses whooped. The first Malaysian PM came in the 1950's and there has been four since then including the last one that got done for homosexuality - still illegal here. The Koran is not very big on the idea. I think that this history explains the nationalism.

Sunday, April 10, 2005
Despite the bus operators offering a quicker ride to Surat I decided to take the train. I am not sure why. Some romantic idea of train travel. I was less inspired when I saw the third class train. Wooden bench seats. Crowded and I was always keeping an eye on my stuff, so I did not get much rest.
Six hours with only the meager provisions I got from a 7-11 in KL. There were hawkers going up and down the train but I was not game to give it a go. Not the place to get the shits. I was not even confident enough to get up and look for somewhere to have a piss.
Beautiful country side that I would not have seen on the bus and you could smoke out of the open window. When I arrived I told the tuktuk driver to take me to a hotel, the big one. He looked at me incredulously. Five stars, 1000 baht + a night. I said "Yep", I have had a long day. He dropped me at this new establishment which is only 500 / night. Luxury. TV (only Thai channels), en suite and air con. I had a shower, changed clothes and went out to diner for 116 baht. Surat seems so far like a small south east Asian town. There is some very unwholesome smells in the street where I am staying, a complete lack of road rules and I am getting used to the idea of being the only European in sight. Get a few odd looks. Hate to make any judgments without having a proper look around which will be tomorrow's priority. That and choosing somewhere more economical to stay, in the short term.
Interruption!: there was something that sounded like shouting in the street. I stuck my head out the window to take a look and there is only a fucking elephant walking down the street with someone on its back and a flashing light on its tail. There you go.

Wednesday, July 13th, 2005 8:36 am


Welcome - July Odyssey.



Well, I have made it out of the yahoo nexis and into the world of open source, on line, blogging... whatever that means.



Hopefully this will be more reliable and have less ads than the last one... we will see.



For those who are new to this concept, check out my previous site at: http://www.geocities.com/aluishusgoodthing/odysseywelcome.html



This gives you a pretty good idea of what it is all about. Basically I am working and traveling, so instead of sending those soulless mass emails that no one reads anyway, I put all the crap on the net, send out a link, and it is up to the interested to look it up for themselves.

The last update was not since February, so there is allot to catch up on. When I left you I was boarding a plane to sunny Perth to catch up with family and friends. This I did. I have even drafted the March Odyssey that, I swear will be online shortly.



After only one month in the city of lights I was on the road again. To give the edited highlights: I flew into Singapore and had few days skipping around, then it was a bus to Jahor and onto Malacca - an old Dutch/Portuguese/British settlement on the west coast of Malaysia. From there it was onto KL for a few days. keen to check out my new place of residence in southern Thailand, I boarded a Malaysian railways train to Hat Yai where I connected with Thai-rail to arrive in Phun Phin, a few kms from Suratthani.



Here I checked out the town and did some research on my new employers. They passed my inspection but I thought I might keep my options open, so I headed up to Bangkok to see what else was available. Unfortunately the idea of living and working in the outer suburbs of BKK did not appeal. So I caught up with a friend who was working up there... Hi Simon, and he was good enough to show me around some of the less salubrious side of the "City of Angels". I also headed over to Ra le Beach, near Krabi for a spot of diving and to enjoy the Thai new year celebrations - Songkran. This is a giant water fight, with buckets of water being tossed in every direction to provide a brief respite from the summer heat.



Before starting the new term I headed over to Ko Pa-ngagn to experience one of the infamous full moon parties. I was thoroughly unimpressed.

I have started work for a small privately run school called "The Language" who subcontracts me out the a local government school in the centre of Suratthani called Suratpittiya. I could not have found a better place to work. The kids are amazing and the staff bring in all manner of Thai culinary delights to tempt out palates. However, this can be the subject of a whole new chapter.

In the meantime, suffice it to say that against all probability, I am alive and well, living the expatiate lifestyle here in the southern provinces of Siam - a land of smiles, contradictions and corrupt constabulary, which can be best explained by the acronym - T.I.T. or "This is Thailand!"

Till next time take it easy and I will try and do better at staying in touch.

Peace out

Al